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Hell Hospital pt.2

January 29 – February 4 – Antelope Valley Hospital, Lancaster California. Floor 2, room 274 bed 4 and 2

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Plumbers?! Yes plumbers! Come on in and see the women sick, half dressed, sitting on commodes, needing help.

I guess a sink was leaking in our room against the opposite wall from me when i was in bed 4 [sink next to bed 1]. So, men [plumbers] were coming in and out of the room like it was nothing. NICE!!!!! Try sitting on a commode with strange men entering and exiting your room praying no one opens your curtain. Or going to use the bathroom whilst holding your gown closed so your backside does not show. Humiliating!!

My husband told me they were talking between themselves through the wall into another room on the other side of the wall fixing that sink as well…REALLY!

What the Hell were they thinking?? Either shut off the sinks until we are gone from the room, or move us to another room while the work is being done. I truly am at a loss with this one. Cannot get my head around it at all. WTF!!

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Below are a few more pics for documentation of  my bruises I came home with.

one of many bruises

thigh bruise

tie off bruises

left hand 7 day

right hand 7 days

right hand day 7

Day 2 - lovely! lol

I have never been so happy to be home in all my life!!

I called their ‘Patient Relations’ today and am awaiting calls back from the director, head of nursing and a CEO!!

***to be continued***

Blessings and Hope!!

Appropriate Horoscope

PISCES

Sometimes you need to take a stand. Today brings a golden opportunity to show that you’re different from the rest and are capable of making difficult decisions when the stakes are high.

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hmmmmmmm

Hell Hospital pt.1

January 29 – February 4 – Antelope Valley Hospital, Lancaster California. Floor 2, room 274 bed 4 and 2

This will be a series of blogs as so much happened that I am still trying to process my thoughts. I am lost and trying to find my way back. NO ONE should ever be treated with the dis-respect and outright disdain when they are at their worst. I have good, private insurance and[+] medicare, and was treated like cattle. Even without good insurance or any insurance, NO ONE should be treated this way. I was humiliated and and I am here to share my story and NEVER let this happen here [AV Hospital] again.

This may have some TMI moments, but in order to help someone without a voice I will let my vulnerabilities show.

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Per the National Guidelines for medical care – IV Insertion:
No more than two attempts at cannulation per nurse per patient should be done to avoid unnecessary trauma to the patient (Fischer, Knob, & Durivage, 1997; INS, 2000).
All medical personnel, nurses, etc, need to adhere to this guideline by law.

I was ‘poked’ in order to put in a line 12 times. The veins on my hands were fine. But after shoving the line in, pulling out a tad, adjusting, shoving in a different spot, my veins blew. The same thing was done to my left hand next by the same nurse. I count these as 4 times. [2 each hand] She decided to wait for the next shift. REALLY!! Already going into my 4 hour awaiting my treatment for pain. None as of yet. In to the 5th hour a couple more nurses came to see if they could get a line going. Seems my veins are not the best due to medications etc. They tied off my arm about 5 or 6 more times [talk about pain] Tried to get into vein 2 more times, no go. Time to bring in the ultrasound to find a vein.

3 days later

7 days later

They bring in the ultrasound, find a vein on my left bicep and get in a line. I have now been admitted and this hell hole for over 6 hours and finally getting my pain meds. A couple hours later had to go to the bathroom. I cannot use a walker, wheel the iv line and walk, so she unhooked the iv line for the time it took to pee. When she hooked me back up to the line, the vein was gone. My body went cold and I cried. The pain getting this one in was so intense and I was not sure I could do it again. I had heard mention of a pick [?] line, but no one did this. The CN [charge nurse, I think] came in and checked around. After a few, stop the blood flow to the rest of my body tie offs…she found one in my right forearm. OMFG, it was in, it was working, and all was good. Or so I thought…

The next couple of days were fine, IV wise…but somehow I knew it was too good to be true.

Tuesday night…the iv seemed to be leaking when my pain meds went in. Sure enough. So, the RN came in, untaped it, slid it back in the same spot further, and re-taped! Hmmmm, seemed to work…for an hour or so. The pain and the itch became quite unbearable and my arm had swollen up and became very red. After 2 button pushes for a nurse, one came in and removed this IV. It was now bad. Fear took me over and another chill set in. WHAT THE F*#* NOW!!

The day after…ouch

After a couple more, please just cut my arm off elastic tie offs, no veins found. So, why not get use the ultrasound again?? No answer. An icompetent, cocky lil know it all nurse comes in and acts all cool like. ‘oh, look at me I found a vein!’ She sticks me in what she calls a ‘juicy’ vein in the crook of my right arm. UM NOPE, not in a vein. I do not care that you THINK blood was flowing, not a vein. She flushed it and the pain was as if someone put my arm into a fire. Mind you, this is just below where the other bad line was removed. She tells me it is fine and leaves. They come and give me pain meds and again it was fire and no pain relief. IT WAS NOT IN THE VEIN!!!! First clue you incompetent baffoon…PAIN PAIN PAIN. They never hooked me back up to any fluids, only gave me pain meds…that obviously were going into my arm someone other than a vein.

After a night of Hell and arm pain, I was taken to the GI LAB for my colonoscopy…

GUESS F*#*ing what… the IV WAS NOT IN MY VEIN!!! This according to the nurses and techs in the GI lab!! HELLO!!!!!!!! [sidenote; GI lab was full of professional caring individuals, the only light in my week of hell]

As the nurse went to add fluids to get my IV going, I started shaking uncontrollably, chills took over and tears flew. I could not control my body. The pain was immense. This was how she found that the IV was not done properly. NOT IN THE VEIN!! She immediately removed it. Now, what do we do?

By now, I just want to go home. I have no more veins, I cannot handle anymore pain, please just let me go home.

please no more

The only place left are my legs/feet. A male tech first tried my left upper foot. OMFG, the pain…WOW!!! No go..

Right foot!! SUCCESS!! Not without pain though. But it was in and it was working well. Sadly, the colonoscopy did not go well so a redo was set for the next morning. [stay tuned! lol]

The nurses on my floor were not too happy with my new IV, BUMMER!!

niiiiice!!

See what a great job floor 2 did a gr8 job giving me pain meds in my foot IV, this was fun!!! But, this was after I was left sitting on a commode for 3 hours!!!!

**to be continued

As always…

Blessings and hope!

Ah Life!

So, the 4 day pain in my head has quieted…now just an agonizing throbbing. My neuro called in a script to Rite Aid for me and they said they would not take it over the phone!! WTF! By the time they let us know it was too late for Rog to drive and pick up the prescription from the neuro. All this went on I was sleeping, or I would have said to call CVS or Walgreen’s. I have been a customer at this Rite Aid for 7 years.  They now have lost a customer, and I will be calling to let them know it!! rofl

Not much sleep last night, serious back pain. I’m thinking it is from lying down for the past 4 days or it may be an infection. UTI, Kidney, Bladder…one of those. Sadly can not go to the doctor as right now can not afford it. We have to pay 2000.00 oop before the 80/20 kicks in, then 3500.00 before full coverage. Thanks to an illness, that I did not ask for, and the greedy people behind Blue Cross. My doctor uses lab corp but they [ins] do not cover lab corp [Quest], so I need a new doctor now too. NICE!!

I’m afraid to tell my neuro too much of what’s going on with me as he will put me in the Big House! lol Then he’ll have them hook me up to some IV Solumedrol. He knows how much I love that stuff. I’m actually thinking it may be a good thing, as the pain is becoming too much for me. Thanks to Rite Aid, I ended up having to take more than one of my pain killers which dummied me up enough for the headache to go but brought on serious tummy issues. Ah, the joys of being me! [for bad serious esophageal pain, white bread de-crusted - pain is gone] Seriously!

So now I sit [back pain too much to lie down] wondering what today will bring. Sorry not more positive, bit it’s hard when life hands you all the lemons and your juicer is broken! :-P

Blessings and Hope.

Enjoy the Ride!

Enjoy the Ride!!

Blessings and Hope!

Three day headaches does not a happy Tracy make!!

It is like water torture; constant pain, split second relief, you smile and bam it comes back. Then due to lying down for the past couple of days, my lower back is on fire, and that makes my legs spasm. Happy, happy, joy, joy!! My whole body feels weak and my parts will not work they way they need to.I’m drained an my body feels ‘floaty’. Rog said, ‘that’s cool’[gotta love him]. hmmmm No babe, not so much.  :-(

I called my neuro as I am hoping he will prescribe me something for the pain[s]. My pain med. is not working [figures], all it does is take the edge off. Not acceptable. :-P

So just a quickie! lol Off to lie back down.

Blessings and Hope

Memories of a love lost…

They were apart, it was her doing. Come back she cried. No, he was through. Her insecurities and cruel comments were too much to take. He tried to understand, but it was over…this time. She could not breathe. How could she live without him in her life? How could she show him it would be different? She was so scared, scared he would leave her so she figured she’d be cruel. That it was her making him go. She could not understand why he loved her. She was nothing, he was everything. He would cheat someday, didn’t they all. Now he was gone. Her love, her life.

They were young. She knew from the moment she saw him, she loved him. Tall, dark hair, hazel eyes. Her heart. But it could not last, would not last. She trusted no one. And her fears inevitably would push him away. She had loved before, but never loved to her soul. Her first love. Words spoken. Some can never be taken back. He told her once she made him feel important, loved. And she did love him, with every ounce of her being. But, now he was gone. He was not coming back. How was she supposed to live, to go on?

She’d smile and laugh in public. In private, her tears burned her cheeks every day. They talked, she heard him drive by. Run to the window, please stop. Her heart beating fast, anticipation. She’d watch him drive away. He stopped once, came to the door. She had someone there, no one really, but he just looked and walked away. She wanted to run, to run and tell him she loved him. Without him she could not survive. But, she stood frozen. He had said to leave him alone once, so she did. Letting go she hoped would show him how much she loved him. It was all she had to offer.

Months passed, he found someone new. A child on the way. Her heart broke that day. Would her tears ever end? Would her heart ever mend?

One last time, at a friends. They ran into one another. She tried to be so strong. She saw it in his eyes, he did still love her. But it was too late. As the song says, ‘Letting go, is just another way to say I’ll always love you so.’ She had to let go, she had to find herself again…could she. Has she now?

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She has love now. She loves for the last time. But, sometimes in the night she sees his face. Did he ever really love her? She was told once, she was his first love as well. Then why was it so easy to let her go. Does he ever think of her? Does he ever wonder, what if?  Does it matter anymore? A part of her heart disappeared that cold day never to return.

Letting go…

Blessings and Hope

She is falling, her dress flies all around her, she sees no end, not stopping, no slowing down. Visions pass by her eyes as if she is seeing her life all around her. Pictures in her mind of days long ago. Smiles, laughter, anguish, fear, so many feelings. Faces she remembers, faces that have no meaning. Are they of people to come or of those from a past time? Falling still, has time stopped or just slowed down to let her see. She reaches out to certain pictures, places she wants time to stop and bring back to her. The dress tickles at her face as it flows around her. She cannot help but laugh.

Faster, faster she falls. It is much to dark here. Fear hits, she can feel the blood flowing through her veins. No more laughter, she wants to stop falling. She cries out, no one hears, no one is there. The faces she sees flying by her are no longer smiling. They’re distorted, angry, scared. She closes her eyes, no longer wanting to see. Two words go over and over in her mind… ‘Save me!’

© 01/16/2010

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I went to my neurologist yesterday. Every time I go, I think part of me feels that this time will be it. There will be a new medication, a cure. See, sometimes I do think positive thoughts. :-) But, alas, not. I am falling more on my 18.2 foot trek to the potty with my walker. I spoke to him regarding a medication I have been reading about, Low Dose Naltrexone [LDN]. It is a medication used for drug overdoses, addicts, etc. in high doses to help the addiction or jump start the heart from od’ing. In small doses [1.5mg - 5mg] it has been found to help the sxs of MS, Fibro, and other autoimmune disorders. It brings the endorphin levels back to normal which help the immune system to recover and do what it is supposed to do. It is not a cure, nor does it reverse the damage already done by these disorders. But, It has been found to slow or in some cases stop the progression of the disease.

I printed out all the info I found and gave it to my Neuro. It is not widely used in the US as of yet. He is going to do some research into this, contact a highly regarded pharmacy, and hopefully get me started on it at a low dose to see if it helps me in any way. Since our insurance has changed [shitty blue cross] and we have to pay almost 3500.00 out of pocket until full coverage, we have to be careful what I try. He offered me a clinical trial for Tysabri, but that medication still is not my drug of choice. And the side effects scare the crap out of me. So, we will see what we can do about the LDN and take it from there.

I do not expect any miracles…but it could happen!

Thanks to Kathy for the heads up on this medication [LDN].

Blessing and Hope!

So tired…

of falling…

Does this mean I should use my Wheel-chariot all the time? No, no, no… I can still shuffle 18.2 feet. I will do that until I cannot any longer. But it hurt today. Did not hit my head, but landed hard on my back. Medication, sleep.

Short and sweet today… good night!

Blessings and Hope!

For the past two nights my mind has been blank. I’ve been reading the Twilight books. Finished Eclipse in 6 hours and am half way through Breaking Dawn. Loving me some Vampires!! lol

The kids are finally back in school after a 3 week vacation. It figures their first day back, and my first day alone in 3 weeks, I was not feeling well. My kindle has been keeping me company. I was all ready to get out to my jewelry table and create some new things, and BAM could barely move. I so know that when ‘Aunt Flow’ visits, it affects my MS in a yuck way. And what do you know, the bitch came to visit yesterday. I know… TMI!!  :-P So, reading and sleeping was my day.

Today will end up the same, it seems. Other than a conference call meeting at 10am, I’m off for the day for more Kindle time and sleep. I hope this [aunt flow and the tireds] ends soon. I have been designing things in my head for days now and so need some ‘jewelry’ time. It clears my head and makes me feel like I have some purpose. I finally purchased my domain name, so stop by and check it out. A Fabulous Flair It is still a work in progress. Still deciding on backgrounds etc.

Well before I start rambling about more stupid stuff, I’m out!

Blessings and Hope!

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