Anger · Health · healthcare · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · Primary Progressive MS · Strength

And here we go again… Part 2

You’re gonna love this one… I just received an explanation of benefits from Independence Blue Cross stating that they are not fully covering the ambulance ride from the hospital to the rehab center after my hip surgery. I guess I should’ve just hooked my bed up to a car and rolled over that way. Ummmm idiots, I have no choice as to who the case manager at the hospital decides to use for transport.

The best part, my husband told the caseworker not to use American medical response, and she did anyways. 😳

I also received a second explanation of benefits in regards to my hip surgery. Again, I should’ve pre-certified breaking my hip first before I got the surgery. Logically, I understand the concept of precertification, but not in this case. So, we should’ve waited a couple of days before doing the surgery as I was lying there with a broken hip? What exactly am I supposed to do about this? They need to take it up with the fucking hospital and not me.

Thank you to those sending me your horror stories dealing with Independence Blue Cross/Anthem Blue Cross, etc. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this as well. Trust me, we will be heard!

Yup, sharing this one again!
Anger · Fear · Health · healthcare · HELL · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · Primary Progressive MS · Quotes · Strength

And here we go again…

Oh Independence Blue Cross… You’re just disgusting! Seriously how do the people that work there sleep at night knowing what they’re doing to people on the other end. They are now telling me that I may be billed $5670.09 for my hip surgery because it was not pre-certified. So I guess I should’ve called them a couple days before my hip was broken to let them know that my hip was going to break. 😳 I know it’s not as simple as that, but come the fuck on! I seriously feel like they have my name on a list and it says, fuck with her so she goes crazy and dies. 😈

And contrary to what some ‘not so smart’ person in HR at my husbands work said, they only offer Independence Blue Cross and Kaiser, NOT United healthcare. And Kaiser doesn’t have an MS specialist so I am stuck with Independence Blue Cross. I will be looking into Medicare part B. We can’t really afford it, but I’ve got to do some thing.

I’m still trying to figure out why Comcast benefits called me directly. I think I’m going to call them back again and find out why. 🤔

I also had to send in an appeal for the ambulance ride in May after my suicide attempt. 😪 It’s really disgusting all the hoops you have to jump through when you have a chronic illness. Money is more important than human life. It doesn’t pay to be sick.

Health · healthcare · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · Primary Progressive MS · Quotes · Ramblings

The Physical Therapy blues…

I won’t get into any political things here… but the votes are L.E.G.A.L. and President Elect Biden and Vice President Elect Harris ARE our next presidential team! #DealWithIt

Now onto Physical Therapy… Finally after a bunch of fuck ups; getting the nurse here and getting the physical therapy people here, I got a total of three visits. One visit was the nurse signing me in. The next two visits were physical therapy and being signed out. So a whopping two physical therapy visits for a broken hip! I am truly at a loss with Independence Blue Cross. They are the most despicable and disgusting insurance company out there. The worst part is we’re stuck with them through my husband’s work. We can’t do Kaiser because they don’t have multiple sclerosis specialists where I am. You would think such a big company that my husband works for would offer better choices for health insurance. In the end, I think they all work together.

Disgustingly True

Like I always say, they know not who they’re dealing with.

My tide is turning!
Health · healthcare · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · PAIN · Primary Progressive MS

Living the Crazy Train Life!

Hello… Life has been crazy since September 14. I was in the Antelope Valley Hospital from September 14 until September 25 when I was transferred to the Antelope Valley Care Center for recuperation. It was to be for some physical therapy and taking care of my surgery site from the broken hip. I had a total of 23 staples by my left hip and one of those staples by my left knee. I still haven’t really looked at the area as I’m still a bit freaked out about the whole broken hip thing. Insurance gave me a whopping 13 days for physical therapy and rehab. 🙄

Thankfully, on October 8, 2020, I was able to get back home. Both of my feet and ankles were very swollen. It was really cool as when I got home we literally watched my feet go back to their normal size. It’s possibly because the beds in those places are not comfortable whatsoever. The other issue is those beds are made for people under 5’9″. Being 6′ tall, it does not bode well for my circulation. Literally the minute I adjusted myself into my bed, the swelling just magically disappeared. There is still a tad bit of swelling on top of both feet, but very mild.

I am still having some pain in my left hip and I am very nervous to move too much at this point, as the doctor explained that my bones have severe osteoporosis. When they did the hip surgery they obviously moved my leg into a proper position. So now my left leg is much straighter and doesn’t flop to the side as much anymore. The problem is my hip is fighting to go and drop again. So we have put a pillow under that knee to keep it as straight as possible. I’m not sure why they don’t have some sort of braces for me. Although the way my doctors have let me down in the past, I guess I know why. I am going to be getting some physical therapy at home.

The best part about coming home was getting my bed bath and my hair shampooed in my bucket. Oh my gosh getting almost 4 weeks of hospital and nursing home nastiness off of me, was amazing!

This was me, above, in the nursing home. Look how green I look. Okay, okay, it actually is the baby Yoda filter on Instagram. Seriously though, I did feel green a lot of the time I was there. 😏

This picture, above, is after I got home and had my amazing bed bath and hair shampooed! It was Joyous!

I’m thankful to be home, and I’m feeling pretty good. I was a good girl today and got all of my follow up doctors appointment scheduled for the next couple of weeks. They will be done by video call, so that’s a plus. I am hoping to get on a bone medication and they also found a blood clot so I’m hoping to get the blood thinner prescribed to me as well. I am going to keep some hope alive that now that we know more but we’re dealing with, that I will finally start being able to get help. It could happen…

Anger · Fear · FUCK · Health · Multiple Sclerosis · PAIN · Primary Progressive MS · Quotes · Religion · Sarcasm · Strength

Independence Blue Cross you never cease to amaze me.

For a brief moment, I really believed today was starting out well. Then I receive a call from Independence Blue Cross. I guess they feel trying to take your life is not considered an emergency and they are fighting me on paying for my trip to the hospital. I feel like they should just come to my house and shoot me, point blank, in my head. It would be so much quicker and so much less painful for me. Basically they will not allow me to go anywhere to get proper physical therapy and they won’t even give me real visits for my home for Physical Therapy. We can’t continue to pay for private visits, we live paycheck to paycheck and can’t expect help for the visits forever. That speaks volumes to me about what is allowed in our country right now. Again, and I will scream it from the rooftops, I have never ever had this much trouble with my health care insurance until a certain orange idiot took over the White House. I think companies like Independence Blue Cross feel they can deny life-saving care for people because right now our government will allow it. Their internal doctors probably were not intelligent enough to get real jobs so they sit behind a computer to read papers regarding patients, without ever meeting the patient, and make life changing decisions.

At this time in my life I’m not too worried about karma since every day brings something more painful to my life. With that being said, I hope everyone of those people that is denying me the care I need has horrible and painful issues happen to them. I truly feel that’s the only way they will understand what it’s truly like to be chronically ill. Better yet, I hope it happens to someone they love so that they can feel just as helpless and lost as my whole family feels. Was that a bit harsh? Well you know what, it’s a fucking harsh world!

I don’t have over $5000 to be able to pay for that hospital visit. I shouldn’t have to pay for that hospital visit since we pay thousands of dollars a year to have Independence Blue Cross insurance. I don’t know how those people sleep at night. Well, I guess when you have no heart or soul it’s easy. Just remember that one day you disgusting people will have to answer for what you’ve done. While I don’t believe in the heaven and hell aspect of religion nor do I believe in the God that some believe in, if there were a hell… That’s where you people will end up! I’ll see you there, because you see I’m driving the bus… 

I will go on, and to those of you that are trying to blatantly and knowingly hurt my life, be prepared because winter is coming!

Have courage and be kind.

Health · PAIN · Primary Progressive MS · Quotes · Ramblings · Strength

Oh the pain… the pain!

I had my FaceTime neurologist appointment and PT yesterday. Both went well. But… I am paying for the PT today. 😳

I so hope this is true for me. We actually got my right leg into a 90° angle. That was crazy. My left side, not so much. Today Roger (hubby) rolled blankets to keep my knees and legs a little more normal. It hurts quite a bit, but no pain no gain! Thank the universe for cannabis. 😏

Stretching everything is going to be a painful process, but the outcome will be phenomenal! Now here is the shitty part… No more visits per Independence Blue Cross. 🙄 I have to call Monday and get the pain management doctor to call in more visits. WTF!!! My concern is all the work we have accomplished last week will fade away waiting for Insurance to allow me more visits. I really don’t understand how they have the right to run my healthcare. It’s mind boggling. The worst part is that it will start all over. What that means is, I will have to have an admission visit again, then an evaluation visit again, and then the PT visits start. What a fucking racket. All the while people like me are screwed. I just keep telling myself to keep breathing. This will work out, we will find a way. Sadly this just proves to me why people do give up. We have to jump through so many hoops, it weakens our soul.

^^^ I say this, I just wish I could truly believe it.

Have courage and be kind. 

Happiness · Health · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · PAIN · Primary Progressive MS · Ramblings · Strength

The light at the end of the tunnel perhaps…

I had my first in-home physical therapy appointment today. I’m almost afraid to be as happy as I am about it. Muscles were moved today that haven’t been moved for 6+ years. My right leg knee hip ankle, yeah the whole thing 😜 after a few minutes, didn’t hurt as badly. The left leg, on the pain scale a 10. He was almost afraid that my hip was out of the socket. Thankfully it’s not. I realized how the body protects itself today when at a certain point my leg went tight. It basically said, no more! Some of the problem is the knee. I have a frontal torn meniscus and wow!  It’s something that was never taken care of because it was the second time it happened. That’s a whole other story. A good thing is he is going to let them know what I need for my legs. Starting with a knee brace for my left knee. He was so helpful and even did the breathing with me. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but a couple times I thought my leg was going to snap.

He will be coming back Friday. The problem I may run into is, of course, Independence Blue Cross. At this point I have four visits. Technically the first nurse visit to fill out the paperwork, and the PT visit just to assess my situation, along with the last visit when they sign you out of rehab whatever, and the visit today, that’s already four visits. 😳 Now that he knows the range of motion and what it’s going to take to help me, I should get more visits. I think I’m going to have to send an email to Jason at Independence Blue Cross. * I know there are many run-on sentences. I’m a little medicated as the pain right now is pretty high. Kind of like me. 😏

After PT I actually felt positive. That is kind of a strange feeling for me. I am going to go with it and see where it takes me. I just hope that Independence Blue Cross will allow me enough visits. I am definitely going to need a month or two since it’s only a couple times a week. If we can get everything stretched out then I’ll be able to get back in my wheelchair. Right now, that’s really all I’m pushing for. Once that happens, I can possibly get Physical Therapy to help me be able to transfer on my own. It could happen…

Have courage and be kind.

Fear · Health · Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · Primary Progressive MS · Ramblings

You’ll get through this!

I have made it through a couple times where I didn’t think I was going to make it. I wish I could say that it’s going to be OK, but I don’t know. I’m trying really hard every day and hoping that something is going to give. I just can’t go another 6+ years in this bed. I’ve had to learn patience, which has never been one of my virtues. I really want to stay positive but I don’t see me getting the help that I need. I’ve been in this bed for over six years and my body has, well, died in a sense. It’s going to take a lot of time and a lot of hard work to make my legs go back to a normal position. Unfortunately, we don’t have the money or the good insurance to get the help I need. And in this moment in my life, unless you’re trapped the way I am trapped, I understand you’re not going to understand. I know, blah blah blah. I just needed to vent it out. I’m struggling, but I’ll get through this. I’ll get through this to wake up trapped again. But, I’ll do it because that’s what everyone wants. OK, that didn’t come out the way it was supposed to, but I think some of you understand.

My legs are jacked the fuck up. I can’t straighten my knees or bend my ankles properly. I’ve been stuck in this bed for so long as I sit up, in my adjustable bed, I get dizzy. My body has literally died being in this bed. Ten to twenty, and I’m being generous, physical therapy visits won’t do anything for me. I can’t sit up unless I have help or something is behind me. But like I’ve stated before, Independence Blue Cross took me out too soon from the rehab. I was sitting up on my own. But when you get kicked out of rehab and you get no good in-home physical therapy, it all goes away.

Yes I know it’s obvious I’m struggling. I just am not sure how to wrap my head around it all. I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore and that’s what scares me. But I’ll keep fighting and hopefully one day it will take me to where I need to be.

I’m sorry if it’s all over the place right now. But I can’t get my thoughts in order so, there it is.

Have courage and be kind.

Medical · mental health · Multiple Sclerosis · Primary Progressive MS · Quotes · Ramblings

We have to keep going!

We must keep going… I know that know. Although, it can be so hard to do. The home health nurse came over last week and now I’m waiting for the physical therapist to call for an appointment. We are not sure how many appointments I’m allowed through Independence Blue Cross. Sadly, it probably won’t be enough. Again, I’ve been in this bed for over six years. The damage done is much more intense than a few at home PT appointments. All about the money and giving their higher-ups bonuses at the end of the year. Meanwhile, I’m trapped in my bed thanks to, in part, Independence Blue Cross. they kicked me out of inpatient acute physical therapy in 2018 too soon, and now they won’t give me any proper care. According to Independence Blue Cross doctors, it’s not needed. My family does as much as they can, but without real help… I really feel like I’m going to be stuck in this bed for a long time. Unfortunately in the world we live in today, insurance companies run our healthcare. Profits over people. I’m still waiting for them to give me my money back for the transport services. With everything going on the world right now, we could really use that 900+ dollars back. Greed prevails… 😳

I’m trying really hard to keep going. I believe I will, but I just need help. My counseling appointment went really well last Thursday, and I will be talking to him again this Thursday. So that’s a plus.

I’m still feeling quite a bit lost but this time I am reaching out. It’s gonna be a long process but I have to keep going. 

Have courage and be kind.