No matter how hard life can get, and it can get hard, I always try to find the light at the end of the tunnel. There really is that light if you look for it. We can wallow in our pain and self pity, or we can look for the good. And, I know there is good somewhere.
MS sucks, big time, but I have it and only I can choose how to ‘live’ with it. I hear people complain how a remodel is going bad or how their kids are back home with them after college. Well, be thankful you have a home and the money to remodel. Be thankful your kids are safe and finished college. I would love to remodel my bathroom and doorways so I could actually shower alone and get through doors without leaving scratches or all out dents in the walls. Sometimes, I hate my home as it is not handicapped accessible for me. I spend most of time in my bedroom as getting through the doors is a pain in the butt in my chair. When I turn my chair on the carpet it lifts and moves, would love to redo that as well. Sadly for us, we do not have the funds to do this right now. BUT, I am thankful to have a home and have a roof over my head.
Again, as I have said in previous blogs, it’s all in how you choose too look at your life. Is your glass half full or half empty? I like to think of mine as half full.
I spend most of my days stuck in my four walls of my home as I no longer feel comfortable driving. We are going to get hand controls one day for my van [when and if we can afford it], but until then I am a ‘prisoner’ in my home. BUT, again, at least I have a home and a handicapped accessible vehicle for my wheel-chariot!
Do not get me wrong, there are days I get pissed off and curse this fucking disease. Ask why the hell me? What did I do to deserve this? I look at people able to walk and want to scream, “Do you know how lucky you are to be able to walk?” I get angry, depressed, and downright mad at God. Then, eventually, when I calm down I see the light. I see a husband who would do anything in this world for me and truly meant his vows, in sickness and in health. I see children who love me no matter if I can walk, be in the sun, run with them, or not. I see parents and siblings who would stop everything [and have] to help me if I ever needed help.
So you see, there is always a light at the end of that tunnel. I guess it is how you choose to look at it!
Blessings and peace!
