Once upon a time there was a girl who loved the sun, the heat, the beauty of it all. Now, not so much! lol
Today is my dd’s first soccer game. I am unable to go. Why you ask? The heat. It is going to be 96 degrees today. I missed half of her games last year due to the heat, and it broke my heart. Now, here we are again.
We all hear the line…’I have MS, but it doesn’t have me!’ I feel that way, most days. Today…NOPE! It does have me today. It is keeping me from seeing my girl play her second year of soccer. It keeps me from being at her practices. So, there are times it DOES have me. Sometimes we need to be realistic in our situations. Today is that time for me. Yet, in a month or so, I will be able to go to her games as the weather will change and the cooler times will come. In this case, that is the light at the end of this tunnel. This year, I now have my wheel-chariot that can get me on the grass and the dirt tracks. So, there is my other light in the darkness.
I truly think it is in the way we perceive our trials. Do we only see the bad, or can we find the good? I try and the find the good. Does it always work? NO. Are there days when no good can be found? YES. Those are the days that inner strength finds her way in and helps me through. Do I hate having MS, degenerative disc disorder, colitis, migraines, fatigue, incontinence? EVERY DAY! Do I ask, ‘Why me?’ All the time. Do I cry in private so my family does not see my pain? All the time. Do I get angry that my kids have had to know me this way their whole lives and watch me slowly get worse? More than anything!! Did I lose my faith? Yes.
So, I find the humor to get through it all. I laugh when I fall. I laugh when I get the shakes. [hubby says I have the rhythm] I laugh as I try to get back up off the floor with the help of my kids. It is quite comical. Two skinny lil things trying to lift their 6′ tall mommy off the ground. So, in come the 6′ tall 15 year old boy to the rescue. When he realizes he need to push up on mommies bum, he freaks out a bit. “Mom, I don’t wanna touch your butt!” Poor child. lol But he does, and up I go.
I am blessed with a family full of love all around me. I am blessed with friends. Does this make it better? sometimes, yes. But, I’d rather be blessed with all of this and be healthy. This is the hand I was dealt, so I will play my hand and do my best to win. This, is life!
Blessings and Peace!
When the world say, “Give up.” Hope whispers, “Try it one more time!”