Right now it is 2:45 PM on Thursday. I just woke the hell up. I guess it’s better than yesterday when I woke up at 3:30 PM. I went to bed at reasonable hours both nights but my body just does not want to wake up. Maybe it’s because I know what it’s waking up to. Maybe after all this time I’m just sick and tired of dealing with it. I’m just not quite sure why it all is hitting me so hard right now, but it’s it’s as if the light at the end of my tunnel is a locomotive coming right at me. I’ve been searching my mind as to why everything is hitting me so badly and I cannot figure it out. Nothing has really changed in the last 4.8 years of being completely bedbound, fuck it the last 5 years ( yes I am rounding up ) to make me feel so lost right now. Or maybe that is the problem, that nothing has changed. I am a grown ass woman who has never been afraid to speak my mind, tell it like it is, or go toe to toe with someone who is a complete dickwad. 😈 But, this piece of shit MonSter that is MS is a different kind of enemy. It is very sneaky and it takes away from your soul not just your body. It not only affects the recipient it affects everyone around them that loves them.
A little bit of advice before I go… If you yourself have MS and are still able bodied, make a list of everything you want to do and do it now! Don’t put anything off because people with our illness we have no idea what the next day will bring. And if you’re Normie, a person with no afflictions, the same goes for you. Make a list and do the things you want to do now, because even though you don’t have an illness, shit can happen in the blink of an eye. So do what you want to do now. Please I beg of you, don’t put it off for another second.